Travel Tuesday – Family Vacation or Couple’s Retreat?

It’s amazing to say it, but my husband and I have never actually gone on vacation together. We’ve taken trips– in fact, we’ve crisscrossed the country probably 5 times together, but always to visit family. We’ve gone to other states specifically to go to weddings, etc., but we’ve never actually been on vacation together.

With our five-year wedding anniversary coming up, we decided we were going to finally take our honeymoon. The first question was one of location, which was quickly settled on: Hawaii.  Neither of us has been, and we’ve both always wanted to go, and since its still in the U.S., we wouldn’t necessarily need to file a bunch of paperwork in advance. But then the second question came, and it was more difficult to answer- will we bring the little lady along?

My first answer was absolutely- with visions of our girl playing on a beautiful Hawaiian beach, wearing a flower lei and grass skirt dancing in my head. My husband, on the other hand, voted for her to stay with her grandparents: how could we expect to snorkel, hike, kayak– basically do any of the activities that drew us to choose Kauai in the first place, if we brought her? Good point, I said, but countered with: can we really be away from her for that long (5 days)? And that far away?

And so we debated the family vs. couple vacation conundrum for a couple weeks and finally decided that we would go it alone. We had briefly entertained the idea of scrapping Hawaii all together, and going to Disney World instead, but I guess the selfish parts of us won out. It sounds weird calling the decision selfish, because I know in the back of my mind that it’s perfectly reasonable to want time to ourselves, in this case, a much delayed honeymoon– but I guess the front of my mind always takes the role of my biggest critic when evaluating my parenting decisions.

Have you had to decide whether to make a special trip a family trek or a couples retreat? What did you decide and would you make the same decision again?

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Category: Parenting, Travel
  • Kathy says:

    My husband and I use to struggle with this all the time. In fact our first vacation to Puerto Rico we brought my in laws along just so we can have our baby & a baby sitter on hand & I still cried the one night we spent alone. =) It will be hard, but it will be worth it! We re-did Puerto Rico alone a few years later and you can’t experience a vacation the same when you have children. Plus it’s your honeymoon! Chances are little Harper won’t remember you guys being gone when she is older. Bring her back lots of gifts and I am sure it will make it all better =) ps. Congrats on 5 years!

    January 16, 2012 at 8:42 am

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